No FUCKEN way..Serious??

Mike: OK, the rumor mill is all the buzz today, Beside Whitney finally leaving Bobby (and the crack) and Britney’s forever ruined once hot belly, it has been said that “Supernova” AKA Narcotics Anonymous will not be allowed to use the name “Supernova” due to the fact there is already a “Supernova”, minus the track marks, tattoos and jaded past. Ryan, there is still hope for you to lead “Supernova” after all! You can read all about it here: http://news.yahoo.com/s/sddt/20060913/lo_sddt/injunctiongrantedinsupernovadispute
You would have thought that someone would have investigated this before hand? Oh well, on to the finale! Andi, Come on Babe…
Andi: Is it time yet? *passes Mike his drink*
Mike: This is it folks! Toby, Dilana, Magni and Lukas are left standing on stage!
Brooke just called Tommy “The Big Man”. She must have seen the video!
Andi: LMAO, Hey..we should rent that video one day..that may be fun! Maybe you can be Tommy and I could be Pamela!
Mike: I must say for the record, Dave Navarro is a scary looking fucker! Oh, Andi..hmm..well, we can check that out later…OK – Fewest vote time. (Last night the voting broke records in 3 countries)
Andi: It is always record breaking time! Serious. They say that every week. Mmmm…look at fucken hot Toby looks!
Mike: Whatever, all the dudes are standing! Go Dilana!
Andi: Shhh..Dilana is a bitch! Sheesh..
Mike: Whatever! Okay, Magni is the first to perform. Not enough votes out of Iceland I guess. He chose “Fire” by Jimmy Hendrix! Playing guitar, if I close my eyes you’d think Jimmy was back. I am going to miss Magni! Andi, stop, not now babe! Let it rest a few. Andi: Sorry honey..but Mmm…Toby is hot and you are hot..and well, I have had a long day and I am horny..
Mike: I know. I will take care of you later. Check this out Lukas is wearing big ol’ white glasses. He looks like he mugged one of the Olsen twins for them. Magni was OK. Not good enough to save his ass if you ask me.
Andi: Yuck..and Lukas has lip gloss on..looks like the kind I left on your collar the other day! Uh, oh..here is goes..
Mike: The second for elimination is… Toby? What the fuck? Lukas blows! Again with the Billy Idol! White Wedding, Go Toby! Actually Toby is looking like Lukas tonight minus the Hello Kitty Glitter. The audience is pissed! They want Toby! They are singing and dancing and, well it is Toby!
Andi: Ah, that pisses me off..Toby did not belong in the bottom two! Besides, you have that EVS tat on your ass…that could look really stupid if he is eliminated.
Mike: No shit..but, Toby rocked as usual! Dilana---and shove a potato up my ass-- Lukas are left. The guys have to send home either Magni or our boy Toby! Oh, commercial time which means, “Hey Andi…”
Andi: Mmmm…I love commercial time….we’ll be right back!

(Insert Moaning and Groping Here)

Mike: Okay, we are back. Damn, Andi is the best 2.5 minutes…seriously! Anyway, Gilby is talking… Blah, Blah, Blah… Get a hair cut!
Andi: His hair seriously scares me. I think he has it back in a scrunchie!
Mike: See you Magni! Say hello to the penguins in Iceland for us!
Andi: Ah, that is too bad. He was sweet. But, not lead-singer material! I still vote for billboard material on E-Bay!
Mike: No shit! Okay, three are left. Dilana, Luk-ASS and Toby. You’re right..Lukas is wearing mega lip gloss just for the guys! Now he get’s to plea his case as to why he is the best for them. Oh, and Dilana. Recap of awesome songs! Where does she buy her clothes I wonder? “I’m the one she tells the band”. Yes babe you are!
Andi: Shhh..come on! No she is NOT!
Mike: Toby, is up to plea his case. EVS. Yes Andi my ass is still sore.. Here rub some of this on it!
Andi: I will rub something..especially thinking of Toby!
Mike: Oh, watch this….Tommy has the shades on! One more time he says! Get ready world! This house is a rocking! OK, now for the performances. I think CBS just gave away the winner on the last commercial.
Andi: No fucken way! I need a drink if that is true—serious!
Okay, here is FAS-man!
Mike: Luk-Ass, “Bittersweet get the fuck off of the stage clown boy”. I wish some one would throw something at him! Oh, watch out, he is doing his best “Scott Wieland” I so hate you, you lip gloss wearing, Olsen twin stolen glasses, Hello Kitty Glitter, Boy George wishing, Wham loving, Duran Duran reject, A-hole!
Andi: Calm down babe..they have to make their quota for the disabled. Here comes Dilana!
Mike: Dilana is doing “Zombie” my FAV!...not now Andi! I am crying right now (literally), Dilana was so great. She has to make it. If so they will go on to be one of the best bands in history!
Andi: Sorry babe…I can’t help it..oh, here is…
Mike: Toby with the “Killer”, “Somebody Told me”… He knows that it is over! Dilana nailed it!
Andi: No way..that was HOT! OMG, I think I need to cum!
Mike: What kills me is Toby and Dilana have just proven that they are in a class far about Luk-ASS. Go Toby! He’s rocking! Pouring his soul out! (He is a tall drink of water BTW)
Andi: Hell yeah he is..mmm..much more to devour. I think you two are the same height though. Oh, now I am nervous….hold me!
Mike: *holding Andi and copping feel* It’s over! Time to choose! Well Andi, what are we going to do once this is over”? “I kinda got used to meeting in seedy hotel rooms with you.
Andi: I know, now there is no more excuses..hmmm..maybe some more couch sessions?? NO..what the fuck? Serious? Mike!! Serious??
Mike: Oh crap, Tommy’s drums are on the stage… What? Stay tuned. “Something is up folks” a riff in the band? Toby is gone over Luk-ASS? Jason is getting booed for sending Toby home! If Luk-ASS wins this I will Boycott Super whatever the fuck there name will be. Final two are Dilana and Lukas – Last night they both had the highest votes!
Andi: No FUCKEN way..serious! Toby can not leave! Who is it gonna be??
Mike: The guys need a few more minutes. I’ll tell you what. The crowd is all holding Dilana signs. If Luk-ASS wins, he’ll never make it out of the building alive.
Andi: I can not FUCKEN believe this!
Mike: The audience is Screaming Dilana!
Andi: Oh, I hate her..but I would rather her than….
Mike: Luk-ASS won! Fuck this!
Andi: No FUCKEN way…

Reporting for the last time on RockStar and now pissed as hell….

(I guess it is an angry-fuck tonight, Mike)

Mike and Andi

PS~I will return to regularly scheduled sex-blogging in the upcoming days stay tuned! Oh, and I am looking for my next Couch Victim...any volunteers??